So, apparently, all new popes get to choose their papal name. The new pope, or Ratzi as I used to call him in our frat days, chose Pope Benedict, I believe. This is in spite of several suggestions I made:

-Pope Boba Fett
-Pope Alufagus
-Pope Onarope
-Pope Awsome
-Tu Pope Shakur

Just wait'll it's my turn. I'll be the coolest Pope ever. It'll be like that movie where John Goodman becomes the kind of England or whatever. I'll go bowling and I'll date a stripper. And I'll have this one uptight cardinal that always follows me around and whenever I do something whacky he'll yell out, "Ai Pappa!" I can't wait.


I've been using the title "Vicar of Christ" for years. I thought about using it as a professional wrestling name, in fact. I'd have moves like Il Pappa's Elbow and The Purgatorial Suplex. Lately with all this pope-news I hear that Pope Benny is using the title. So, I called 'em up all pissed-off and they tell me that "The Church" (how arrogant is that?) has had a trademark on the phrase since Peter. Apparently, they have lawyers who are intent on defending their intellectual (sp?) property. I guess me and "The Rock" are both in trouble now. Of course, they're all gonna be tied up in court on other matters for a while, so I'll be thinking about a new name.  


I question their abillity to trademark such names. Until this is settled in (or out...) or court, think about St. Thomas A-Pain-Us.  


That should say "of court" not "or court." Sorry. I'm drunk and work is really busy.  


the vatican forgot to trademark www.benedictXVI.com!

An American who registered the Internet name BenedictXVI.com before the new Pope was chosen said on Wednesday he had not worked out what to do with it but was pretty sure it would be a sin to sell it to a pornographer.

Cadenhead said he was considering his options for the site but if the Pope's people were to approach him to discuss taking over the site he might make a few requests of the Vatican including "one of those hats" and "world peace."

ha! take that vatican lawyer stooges!  


I'd settle for the hat.  


"Vatican lawyer stooges". Heh. So that's where they ended up. I was thinking maybe Niagara Falls...

Niagara Falls!! Slowly I turn...  


Ai Pappa!  


Is that your way of asking if you can be my little cardinal?  


I like the "Pope Onarope" one, myself.  


It's okay to call me a genius.  


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