Tuesday, July 05, 2005
long weekend
The long holiday weekend was a lot of fun. Friday night, BP and I walked down to Mellow Mushroom for pizza and beer. BP revealed his obsessive compulsive need to center his beer glass directly in the middle of his coaster. He talked about it almost like he was making a confession about some secret shame he harbors. I felt the need to make an embarassing confession as well, to make him comfortable. So I pointed out that sometimes it burns when I pee. And sometimes when I dont' pee. And always when I drop lit matches down the front of my pants.
We were pretty sure we saw a female "escort" at work across the restaraunt. That got us thinking about escorts and what they charge. So we got out a phonebook and called a couple. Not because we wanted escorts but because we thirst for knowledge. In Lexington, the going rate is $150/hour and, apparently, they're low on Asians. After that we went to Kitty's and I refused to kiss some girl because I'm not some cheap floozy who just goes around kissing girls at bars. On the way home we were gonna stop at a local playground and have a monkey-bar climbing contest but we were frightened off by a drug dealer/pedophile sitting in a van just outside the playground.
Saturday, P.Dirty, Kup, and I headed over to E's parent's house to swim with her and F. P.Dirty has webbed toes and therefore swims like a dolphin. It's really kind of beautiful to watch. Very graceful. Later that night I went to Atomic Cafe with BP, Double S, E, & F. There I was recognized by two girls who, apparently, go to my church. I'm like a churchy rockstar or something.
Monday, BP and Double S traveled to my historic birthplace to hang out with the Connies and the rest of my family. It was hard getting everyone together. Mostly because the Connies were afraid BP would steal the fine china and dance around a hat all day. BP was afraid the Connies would think he was their gardner. In the end, though, we all learned an important lesson about tolerance and acceptance.
Monday night we walked downtown in Lexington to see fireworks. Fireworks are really kind of boring. Way to go America.
if it wasn't for saturday full o' pukin', it would've been one of the best weekends ever.
but, as it is, just pretty damn good.
I spent my Saturday swimming and beating F at a game of horse so I say it was one of the best weekends ever.
When I visit, I plan to bring the game that will revolutionize the world. I call it....Ghetto Horseshoes! Genius!
Did you invent Ghetto Horseshoes?
James, are you trying to go behind our back and market the game on your own?!?
I would hate to think what might happen if that's what you were trying to do.
mexican ass-rapin'?
probably.
BP invented that.
I didn't invent Ghetto Horseshoes, but Ian and I are going to take the idea and make a fortune!!!
Post a Comment
We were pretty sure we saw a female "escort" at work across the restaraunt. That got us thinking about escorts and what they charge. So we got out a phonebook and called a couple. Not because we wanted escorts but because we thirst for knowledge. In Lexington, the going rate is $150/hour and, apparently, they're low on Asians. After that we went to Kitty's and I refused to kiss some girl because I'm not some cheap floozy who just goes around kissing girls at bars. On the way home we were gonna stop at a local playground and have a monkey-bar climbing contest but we were frightened off by a drug dealer/pedophile sitting in a van just outside the playground.
Saturday, P.Dirty, Kup, and I headed over to E's parent's house to swim with her and F. P.Dirty has webbed toes and therefore swims like a dolphin. It's really kind of beautiful to watch. Very graceful. Later that night I went to Atomic Cafe with BP, Double S, E, & F. There I was recognized by two girls who, apparently, go to my church. I'm like a churchy rockstar or something.
Monday, BP and Double S traveled to my historic birthplace to hang out with the Connies and the rest of my family. It was hard getting everyone together. Mostly because the Connies were afraid BP would steal the fine china and dance around a hat all day. BP was afraid the Connies would think he was their gardner. In the end, though, we all learned an important lesson about tolerance and acceptance.
Monday night we walked downtown in Lexington to see fireworks. Fireworks are really kind of boring. Way to go America.
if it wasn't for saturday full o' pukin', it would've been one of the best weekends ever.
but, as it is, just pretty damn good.
I spent my Saturday swimming and beating F at a game of horse so I say it was one of the best weekends ever.
When I visit, I plan to bring the game that will revolutionize the world. I call it....Ghetto Horseshoes! Genius!
Did you invent Ghetto Horseshoes?
James, are you trying to go behind our back and market the game on your own?!?
I would hate to think what might happen if that's what you were trying to do.
mexican ass-rapin'?
probably.
BP invented that.
I didn't invent Ghetto Horseshoes, but Ian and I are going to take the idea and make a fortune!!!
Post a Comment
