So there's this website called Archive.org that stores snapshots of old websites. I used it to go back and look at some of the past incarnations of my blog. After doing so I was struck by what a worthless, annoying piece of crap I was four or five years ago. Seriously, sorry to any of you who had to put up with me on a regular basis.

I did see a few things on my old blogs that had a little bit of value. Like the following (which I've edited slightly to get rid of some of the douchebaggery of old):

I've developed a test to determine if you hate me. Actually, I've developed two test for this purpose, but one of them requires peeing on a stick and that's hard to accomplish on the internet. So here's the other one. It's divided into two sections. For every question you answer yes to on the first section, give yourself one point. For every question you answer yes to on the second part, subtract a point. A positive number means you hate me. A negative number means you love me. A zero means you're fairly neutral. Post your scores.

Part one:
1. Has Patrick Drury ever hurt you physically?
2. Has Patrick Drury ever hurt you emotionally?
3. Has Patrick Drury ever made you cry (not tears of joy)?
4. Has Patrick Drury ever broken your heart?
5. Has Patrick Drury ever stolen from you?
6. Has Patrick Drury ever made fun of you?
7. Does Patrick Drury make fun of you on a regular basis?
8. Has Patrick Drury made fun of you today?
9. Do you feel this test might have been created as a way for Patrick Drury to make fun of you?
10. Has Patrick Drury ever taken credit for an idea you had?
11. Has Patrick Drury ever lied to you?
12. Has Patrick Drury ever drank your beer when you weren't looking?
13. Has Patrick Drury ever put the moves on your girlfriend/wife/sister/mom?
14. Has Patrick Drury ever c-blocked you (pardon the indelicate colloquialism)?
15. Has Patrick Drury ever damaged or lost your personal property?
16. Has Patrick Drury been responsible for the death of a loved one?
17. Has Patrick Drury ever received a favor from you without returning one in kind?
18. Has Patrick Drury ever posted mean things about you on the internet?
19. Has Patrick Drury ridiculed you from stage on in a video presentation?
20. Has Patrick Drury ever laughed at your misfortune.
21. Have you ever fantasized about killing Patrick Drury

Part two
1. Has Patrick Drury ever loaned you money?
2. Has Patrick Drury ever tended to a wound or injury you were suffering from?
3. Has Patrick Drury ever held your hair while you vomited?
4. Are you in love with Patrick Drury?
5. Has Patrick Drury ever bought you a drink?
6. Has Patrick Drury ever let you sleep on his couch?
7. Has Patrick Drury ever complimented your appearance?
8. Has Patrick Drury ever made you cry tears of joy?
9. Has Patrick Drury ever helped you meet a girl/guy or assisted you in the romance department?
10. Has Patrick Drury been nice to your pets?
11. Has Patrick Drury ever given you a ride?
12. Has Patrick Drury ever given you good advice?
13. Has Patrick Drury ever taken you to dinner or bought you a meal?
14. Has Patrick Drury ever told you he loved you while obviously sober.
15. Has Patrick Drury ever bought you a present?
16. Has Patrick Drury ever invited you to a party?
17. Does Patrick Drury call you semi-regularly?
18. Has Patrick Drury ever mentioned you on his blog in a favorable light?
19. Has Patrick Drury ever saved your life?
20. Has Patrick Drury performed your wedding?
21. Have you ever fantasized about Patrick Drury

Bonus Points:
Write a short paragraph about why you hate/love Patrick Drury. Give or subtract one point accordingly.

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I got a negative 4. But, in my defense, #1 and #5 on the second part are kind of the same question. So really, I got a negative 3.  


You love and hate me. No surprise there.  


Ok I got a -9. I was kind of nervous halfway though though. I wasn't sure how that was gonna turn out. I guess it's true though. I do love you. I had to answer no for #20 in part 2, but since you are going to marry me I think it should count as a yes. If you'll allow it then I would have -10 and thats pretty good!  


I got a zero. I love hating you, and I hate loving you. Its a vicious cycle.  


My mom scored a -55.  


Your mom has good reason to love me.  


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